I heard a helpful bit of wisdom today that's been around awhile but was new to me. "THINK before you speak" is attributed to the English clergyman Alan Redpath (1907 - 1989).
His idea was simple. Before you speak, ask yourself if what you're about to say is:
T = True
H = Helpful
I = Inspiring
N = Necessary, and
K = Kind
The advice is well-timed for me, because just yesterday, I caught myself saying a few things that, well, I should have "THINKed" about first. It's helpful for me to have this acronym in my life right now.
It can also be a good yardstick to use while sizing up new songs, new blog posts, Facebook comments...you name it.
At a time when there's more communication than ever, THINKing can help prevent harmful misunderstandings and unnecessary conflict.
3 comments:
Great idea, and very helpful; yet there is certainly a place for rebuke, reproof, etc.; THINK can't be to the complete exclusion of saying anything even mildly unpleasant. 'Rebuke a wise person, and they will love you' & 'an open rebuke is better than secret love'. Nonetheless, it seems criticism or rebukes are not at all dealt by most people in a spirit of helpfulness and real love, or done in a private manner. I've found that if I am compelled to speak to someone about something they might take as criticism, it is best to make a compliment sandwich: a compliment, the point (usually not pleasant), another compliment. And of course, as the saying goes, it is all in how you say it! Respect goes a long, long way - too often, a 'negative' comment is spoken in a shaming manner. And we seem to live in a largely shame-based society. People commonly shame other people openly, instead of protecting their dignity and regarding one another as a person worthy of respect - no matter their fault or misdeed, error or ignorance. Because in SOMETHING (or with SOMEONE), we usually ourselves are, or not long ago were, or soon will be, the same: at fault, in error, or ignorant.
Hi Ben,
Thank you for your thoughtful and insightful comment. You're quite right...and I'm sure your colleagues and friends benefit from your respectful communication when conflicts arise.
All the best,
Lynn
I love it! I am a middle school teacher in Florida and I have seen my 7th and 8th graders, on a daily basis, being ugly to each other vocally and online... I will be incorporating this acronym into my classroom and hopefully it will inspire other teachers and administration to adopt this schoolwide!
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