I once saw a songwriter remark that if you talk during a performance in a Texas bar, they just shoot ya.
That shut the talkers up.
Myself, I just hit "delete". (The heckler has left the building, folks.)
Hecklers are anonymous. They don’t step up and identify themselves, even though they crave the limelight.
It’s easier to stand at the back of the room and criticize whomever’s up there than it is to get up and speak—or sing, or write, or paint—from the heart.
Busking is very good practice for anyone, like me, who has a history of being highly sensitive to criticism.
"You must do the thing you think you cannot do."
What did I used to be most afraid of? What did I try to avoid at all costs?
Not pleasing everyone.
So, in the spirit of de-fanging the monster in the closet, let me shine a spotlight on…drum roll please…
"Anonymous"! S/he comes to us from deep within our collective psyche, threatening to expose us as the flawed and fragile selves we truly are. She calls us fakers, failures, whiners. She says we don't belong, wherever it is we happen to be.
She’s our inner critic, and she’s out there.
+++
And in other news...
I had a wonderful time at a school's songwriting club yesterday. In addition to a group of 5th and 6th grade students, I spent an hour with two teachers who are songwriters themselves. One of them came in for the lunchtime session, baby in tow, because he's on paternity leave.
As I often do during those sessions, I found myself affirming the value of all artistic self-expression, whatever form it takes.
Perhaps, if those students hear enough validating messages early in life, they'll continue to develop their own talents, express themselves openly...and respect others who do so.
5 comments:
Well said, Lynn!
Sounds like we have a similar philosophy about facing fears. I remember deciding when I was in high school that I didn't want fear to stop me from doing things I really wanted to do. My first very "small" step was in crossing the train bridge in Saskatoon, which was entirely safe, as there was a narrow boardwalk that ran along side the train track, which didn't make crossing any less frightening. Much more than dental work shook every time a train roared by!
Hmm...perhaps this isn't the best example. So much time has passed I'm now not entirely sure that this was a fear I managed to conquer. Perhaps I only crossed this bridge in my mind. Sigh. Oh well, that's half the battle, isn't it?
How do you know that Anonymous is a she? Are you so insecure that you think only another woman could criticize you? And how could one's "inner" critic also be "out there"? Do you mean "out there" like "out to lunch"? Expressing an opinion doesn't constitute heckling, either. So "heck", if you can't take a little needling, what are you doing in the music business--a place that's notorious for competition. Sometimes listening, even if you don't agree with it, can help one learn and grow. Though, it seems that you'd just rather hit the delete button. Pretty sad!
Hmmmm
I'm not sure what the tussle is about here having not seen the original issue but I can this:
whoever "anonymous" is can't read very well. The posting the person is complaining about uses "S/he" as in "she" OR "he" and does not as the above comment suggests, say that anonymous is a she. D'oh. Although that seems kind of obvious now.
I also had a very different read on what was meant by one's inner critic being "out there." The way it read to me was that critics will always be part of the environment rather than "out there" crazy.
I rather preferred the spirit of the posting - that singing, performing, doing any creative activity "from the heart" is easy to criticize and that it's actually much harder to support artistic self-expression.
This is all kind of odd of course given that fighting over the breadcrumbs of being a musician in the music "business" these days seems a bit of a waste of time.
I've seen the stats on artists' incomes (of all types) in Canada and they ain't pretty.
My support goes to those who try everything they can to keep playing and keep being creative.
- Jim
To Jim B. You didn't see the original posting because it was deleted, perhaps to make anyone who reads this blog think someone had actually said something of a heckling nature. Not a chance! Also, the s/he was seen but then it quickly became she. So Jim, look more closely at some of these pages--and you'll realize it isn't just about a struggling artist. There's a lot more below the surface . . . that's well, kind of odd, very egocentric. One wonders how subway riders like being described as "regular folk." How would this songwriter know? She describes the other musicians and riders as anything but regular.
Further thoughts. It's amazing how normal people, even artists, think they are. Wrong. It's kind of amazing how RIGHT this particular songwriter believes she is. In every aspect of her life. So much so, that having a very slight jab appear on an archived blog--weeks ago--would have generated such an attack from someone who totally BELIEVES, hello, in what they're doing, but clearly, is having doubts. This blog in particular is neurotic with a capital N. Okay world, everybody gets to hear about the uninteresting details of my daily existence including how my kids interfere, my husband doesn't measure up, people cover their ears when they hear me sing in the subway, and oh, soft rock radio guys, don't UNDERSTAND a mom's personal pain a.k.a psuedo busker. If all the i's aren't finished like little hearts and everybody isn't perfectly happy in this songwriter's unreal 'perfect' world--then mainly, YOU are to blame. Not her, not especially, her neuroses and disillusionment about what she's trying to do that's quote "hard." If it's that hard for ya, why bother?
Songwritng aside, this blog is peculiar and pathetic in that it's not entertaining. Mainly. That's the problem. At least Woody Allen, who is also neurotic with a capital, knows how to entertain, sometimes. This songwriter doesn't have a clue. It's all whining, complaining. And . . . you write about people you know in the subway and use names!!!! Are they real names??? Do you have permission to talk about the people you showcase in your blog? Do you care, really, about what you write, or is everyone, and everything around simply there, to use? As material. Your whole existence is just about how I can use the other person's pain, story, whatever, to further my career.
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